Being Ill

A long time ago a Scouse Pagan who I like very much asked me to write about my illness. Several diagnoses, a lot of tests and a long time since that request I find myself having a bad day.

I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, essentially this is the absence of a diagnosis. They can’t find anything specific wrong with me but it’s clear something is. I become far more tired than I should after activity and I can’t accurately judge my energy levels. So yesterday I was feeling almost normal. I went out with friends to the park and did some very mild LARP fighting. I felt tired but not exhausted. I went to bed around eleven and I woke up at eight this morning. I woke up completely exhausted. I slept fine last night, really very dead to the world but I still woke up exhausted.

Right now I am at a LARP event, I’ve brought my tent and a load of set dressing, however I am sat in my car unable to put things up or help out because I’m very tired. I’ve just been told that my tent isn’t needed, it was supposed to be for my npc but I can’t set it up myself because I’m sat here exhausted.

So I’m totally dependent on what other people feel like doing for me. Frustrating isn’t the word for this. Frustrating, upsetting and on top of this I hurt and I’m tired.

This makes me sound awful and to be honest it’s a pretty bad day but I got myself to run the London Marathon a few years ago and now I can’t even get out of the car to put my own tent up.

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