As is pretty obvious from my sudden increase in blogging, although I’m pretty stoic in the face of this situation, I am stressed. Suddenly today there’s been an increase in my background tension and it’s definitely because I’m going back out to work tomorrow. I could call in and say I can’t do this, I … Read More
Why don’t I feel like I’ve lost control over my life? Where’s the panic and anger and fear that I see all over facebook and the mainstream media? Am I not paying enough attention? Do I trust the government too much or do I believe in myself too much? This is serious, I could die, … Read More
“The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.” – HP Lovecraft “It’s a popular fact that … Read More
On Thursdays I feel very loved. On Thursdays I go to see MiL and we game or watch movies curled up on a sofa. There is smooching and talking and such. And on one memorable occasion FJ came home early and me racing to put my clothes on before he got upstairs felt weirdly alternate … Read More
I never want to be completely satisfied, I always want to be aiming for the next thing and then the next. I always want to want. I’ve been accused of being greedy and of making myself unhappy. I don’t think that’s true, I want some things but mostly experiences. At my worst I do make … Read More
If you’re sitting in a coffee shop with an attractive friend is it wrong to look at them and really hope someone in the shop has assumed you’re dating? It probably bespeaks insecurity on my part, but y’know she was looking hot today.
I am thirty seven. I have no children. I am not displeased by this but I am surprised. I had assumed that I would end up with children no matter what I tried to do with my life. The notion that what I do, what I aim for and what I attempt actually affects my … Read More
For a weekend that included panicked phone calls in the pouring rain, tyre-eating potholes and an AA van breaking down it was surprisingly good. Started out with our LURPS pub quiz team, Off The Straight And Narrow, coming second. Who would have guessed that Astrophysicist, The Steampunk Cosplayer, Martial Artist and I would make such … Read More
I’m pretty pleased with the extent to which I kept the resolutions I made last year so I’m hoping I do the same with these. 1. Swim each week. 2. Write each day. 3. Finish a good manuscript.
I don’t want to go to Empire this weekend. It’s not just about having a sore throat that I’ve had for weeks it’s about recognising that what I originally went to Empire for is not what I get now. I went to Empire to roleplay with friends in a wider world. In some ways that … Read More