Changes Or Remains The Same?

HURRAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I’ve lost two lovers is one way to look at things. Yes, FFG and Giggles have finally got together. Course another way to look at things is that they do seem very happy which makes the whole house seem happier.

My plans for tonight have gone out of the window of course, which is always the downside when these things happen so fast. To be honest the situation is not entirely new to me; Cornish Bloke and Tor got together, G is really probably best left alone for purposes of this list…lovers come and go thats what my life is all about. No one gets too close, no one stays for long enough to make me feel scared. I wish they wouldn’t keep saying how much simpler their lives are now.

Did I really make things so much more complicated? I guess I did, it all seemed so much simpler to me though. The Curious Orange keeps telling me how much happier Giggles is now that she and FFG are deffinately together. Looks like I really was causing most of her misery then. I met her properly when she was completely pissed and giggly, we had a whol lot of fun, and I stored up some brilliant memories. Though my outlook on life might make me more relaxed and a whole lot more fun to be around than when I was in relationships it looks like it does the opposite to other people.

Ever since the first Writers Guild Party in Ullswater Road when we were all crammed into that tiny living room and the first orgy really occurred Archangel has been saying I’m a catalyst for the sexual things occurring around me. Maybe thats not so true anymore, maybe all I do catalyse into action is misery and confusion for other people. A prime example is the now apparently open relationship of FoxyJonno and Princess Lex, how much dissaproval did I get from various sources for responding to the FoxyJonno, for doing what I do, have a whole lot of physical fun? I didn’t realise that he was unhappy, as the various sorces reported. Maybe I simply haven’t realised that its my fault Giggles has been so unhappy.

It seems my perfect solution just doesn’t work for anyone else. It’s only ever meant to be a short term solution but maybe people can’t do that anymore, maybe it’s too immature (as the lovely interviewer from Cosmo magazine implied). Perhaps the adult thing to do would be to go back to the one night stands, which quite frankly are unsatisfying. So how do I find a nice lover who’s into no strings attatched sex? Lucky it’s Freshers Week next week really!

For those of you who are prone to half reading my diary, or reading it and then editing it to say what you want it to or what you think you can take most offense at. Giggles and FFG getting together is a good thing, they could really do the relationship thing whatever my personal opinions on relationships. I am not upset about them getting together, the way in which they have done so and various things they have said has merely led to me questioning the way in which I conduct my life.