What is it that makes a woman? I do deny on occaision being female, as far as I’m concerned on many issues I’ve opted out of the gender question; is it any easier to have dropped out of the horrible stereotypes than to claim womanhood and fight against them openly. Course it has to be said I’ve never really associated being female with being a woman; to me being female is asking those damn silly questions like ‘Where are you going’ when your boyfriend is going to the loo or asking ‘does my bum look big in this when you’re going to kick up a fuss about anything he answers: occaisionally my sister excels in being female. But then for the past couple of weeks I’ve been being randomly female about various things. Then it pisses people off when I claim womanhood because they see it as being inconsistent.
Woman. It’s an interesting word, you can tell if someone is really screwed up about her gender if she spells it with a ‘y’, kind of like adding a ‘k’ on the end of ‘magic’. I mean primarily its about genitalia I guess. I am a woman with my boobs and bits. But it doesn’t make me a woman does it? My ability to procreate by creating life inside me, is that what makes me a woman? I’ve never been too hung up on the idea of children, certainly I’ve never done the polarity thing mand-woman fecundity thing making me a woman…well my sex life will bare me out on that one.
So why am I so secure in my identity? How do I know I’m Mish, woman, me? I introduced myself yesterday to one of Muppet Boy’s friends as ‘Mish, I’m like nobody you’re ever going to meet.’ Thats not actually true, but I’m beginning to believe that not many people actually notice that I’m like a lot of other people.Patterns jus don’t get observed. I’m a woman and I love being a woman. It doesn’t just come down to genitalia, its about something else. It must be about something else or else how can anyone who’s trans make a judgement? How can anyone who’s born hermaphrodite decide or know that they’re not either sex?
What makes me a woman? Hormone levels? Some infinite subtle understanding about the universe? I am not womanly, well ok insert boob joke here, but I meant in my manner. I can be girly and I can do sexual but womanly seems to pass me by yet I know that I am a woman. This seems to be an integral certainty, I don’t think that there is anything that can change it.
I’m glad about that.