I want out

I want out I want out I want out.

I wasn’t smart enough for an academic career. I’m not committed enough for a teaching career. All I am is flaky, and I need out of here.

I have two observations to get through and a final presentation.

I want out.

I’m going to crash, I’m going to crash. I can feel it, like a hand thats stroking at the very back of my brain, I’m so prickling and so itching and it’s going like ice down through my spine and I’m not good enough for anything, I have to run and theres nothing anywhere.

3 thoughts on “I want out

  1. Mish, I am absolutely certain that you can do these last few things are required of you. You are a strong person, you have to be because of the amount of time you’ve already spent teaching. I couldn’t do it, I’d have run in the first week, but you’ve stuck with it.
    I know this might not bear much weight coming from a faceless internet person, but we have met a few times and the person that you are has absolutely floored me with how clever and strong you are.
    Hell, even if you did decide to pack it in, you can do anything with yourself, I can see it in you.
    So don’t panic, just be you, and things will be alright.

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