My Boyfriend Knows All

Looking down at my arms (which have been truly hideous with excema recently) I observed,
“Y’know, I really do heal quickly.”

“Oh yes,” replies the Jellicle Cat. “And I’ve worked out why that is.”

I nod, assuming he’s going to remark on how, because I’ve had excema my whole life my skin is just used to having to heal up.

“I’ve seen you putting down keys absent-mindedly and not knowing where they are a couple of minutes later.” he continues.


“You’re Wolverine. No wonder you had fantasies of being an Alien Space Princess, y’see this explains everything… what’s it like having Charles Xavier in your head?”

“Mutter mutter mutter…you’re never going to forget that are you? XXXXX (protecting anonymity) had batteries y’know.”

“I love you my strange mutant.”

And all of this delivered in completely deadpan Jellicle Cat tones.

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