Talking to people and experiencing it for myself I am noticing that there is a difference between queer and straight expectations after a break-up.

It might be men vs women but I suspect it’s actually straight vs queer. Straight break-ups require much more breaking of contact. Queer ones there’s a level of continuing contact, trying to forge through to whatever the new relationship should be.

I’m not sure if it’s an offshoot of the assumed relationship escalator of a straight relationship that if it doesn’t end up in a household combining then it’s failed and needs to go whereas a queer relationship is usually much more intentional and the assumption is that you’re going to end up in contact with this person again so you need to actively forge the relationship into something else?

Maybe it is more a queer woman thing, I’m not certain queer men do this exactly.

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