Screaming Inside

Today I had a very surreal experience.

I was at work and I suddenly came over wanting to cry but obviously couldn’t so I tried to concentrate on work and felt like I’d divided myself in two and one of me was screaming in a tiny room. It was so real, it was like I was on acid or something.

I was talking and at the same time screaming, like absolutely literally not figuratively, but also not out loud in the very real world either.

I did some of the therapy exercises when I got home and I emailed the very nice psychiatrist who kind of doesn’t have to reply but I’m hoping he does.

I thought I was doing a lot better but this pretty much suggests I’m not doing as well as I thought. Or at least that healing is really not a straight line.

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