In two weeks I will complete my current run of therapy. It’s been a bit of a trip, working through and processing old trauma right in the middle of new trauma. Trying to remain present when all this is happening around me is really hard and my coping mechanisms have gotten really unhealthy. On the other hand at least I’m more aware of them.
I’m getting a lot better at identifying what is going on in my head rather than checking out and checking out is definitely something I’ve been doing a lot. I think the blog is probably as good a method as any of keeping me on track of what’s happening. My diaries have come up a lot over the course of the therapy. So has my art, Christ when the act of creating something is too real you’ve gotta work out that something’s wrong.
Now though, I think I need to process this year, maybe start walking on Thursdays.